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Sneaking Around?

January 5, 2011

Dear Oracle,

Ok so I really like this guy. We have been flirting back and forth for awhile but he’s kind of a player. His longest relationship was 3 months which, compared to all my other friends relationships, is not very long. Also, I’m technically not allowed to date until I’m 16 (I’m 14 right now).  We have been texting back and forth all Winter break and he told me he really likes me but all of a sudden he stopped replying. Do you think its worth it to sneak around behind my parents back (i really like him though!)? Also, can you help me out? I can’t figure out if I should spend my time on him when I can’t even figure out his true feelings about me.

Thanks,

Lovesick

Hi Lovesick,

If you can’t figure out his true feelings about you, then you’re probably sensing that they aren’t very deep. He obviously likes you (he’s said so himself), but if he REALLY liked you, you’d be confident about that—and he wouldn’t have stopped replying to your texts.

You introduced this guy as being “kind of a player”. Is that a guy worth breaking the rules for? It sounds to me like your parents have your best interests in mind. Maybe they know what the Oracle keeps telling her readers—that teenage guys are usually not super mature. They likely want to save you some heartache, which is pretty cool, actually.

Remember what happened when Kayla told Viv to date Max against her parents’ wishes? Disaster! And in that case, Max was very interested in Viv…and he wasn’t a player.

How about this: if, over the next few weeks, you become convinced that this guy is the real deal, talk to your parents about him. If not, I’d wait until a better guy comes along before asking your parents to change their rules…

Good luck,

The Oracle

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. Loveless permalink
    February 1, 2011 5:30 am

    I m really sad because the guy I have been crushing on since 7th grade now has a crush on bff . I told him I like him but nothing is working Help me !!!

    • AnEverydayGirl permalink
      February 17, 2011 3:10 am

      Dear Loveless (lol, I very much feel like Kayla right now),

      I’m no Kayla (aka Oracle) or a professional but since I’m also a girl and have had a similar situation to you I think I can help. From the sounds of it, the guy you have a crush on probably doesn’t feel the same for you like the way you do for him. If you told him you like him and that isn’t working then maybe it wasn’t meant to be.
      But if you really want to date him or get him to like you then you should get to know him more. Let him find out more about yourself too so that way you both can get closer. Oh, and if you’re not already friends then becoming friends with him first might help because it might be a way for him to grow feelings for you. Also, don’t get too clingy, pushy, stalkerish, obsessive, annoying (etc.) because that will drive the guy away. Another thing, you should first ask yourself if this guy is worth it and if you want to risk your relationship with your bff by trying to date him
      Well, that’s all I can think of for now. I hope I helped.

      Sincerely,

      AnEverydayGirl

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